i am not MOVING!..

i love my school, i love my friends, i love my subjects!

why does everybody else seem to know what is best for me? isn't that supposed to be my job of knowing?

i REFUSE to transfer to another school! argh!

i really don't! i don't like it one bit! i am so pissed off! i love everything now! what else can i say? hm. i didn't decide for this! 'they' decided for ME! argh!

my MOTHER wants me to take an exam for Malayan college! they want me to transfer schools just because they don't think that i am pushing myself top hard. being in a trimester school and all that! crap!

me don't want to move! :'(

i hope i don't transfer!

..gone with the wind..

gone with the wind..
gone with the wind..
gone with the wind..

everything and everyone dies. its just that when you die, you leave a certain memory to all your friends who have been with you through good and bad times during your life.

last November 9(Friday), a friend of my father visited us at our house. knowing that he was dead and all, he still went to give our family their condolences. upon remembering their good times in the ship where they worked most of their lives, he began to be teary eyed. it suddenly struck my consciousness that my father was in fact no longer with us. he is in a better place. i think that it is just now that i am realizing that he died.

i did not have the chance to cry like my mother for my father, i was not able to because a lot of people in my family are now counting on me to be the man of the house. being the man of the house i would be responsible of the appliances, cleaning, fixing, and maintaining them. nobody knows how much i want to cry. i just haven't had the chance to talk to anybody about this because all of my friends are happy. i don't want to be the reason why they would become sad.

now that my 'sadness' is over, i can concentrate on the more important stuff.

now that i got that out of my chest, i can breathe easily. thanks for reading my "emo" blog.

-end blog-

what do young people think is enjoyable to watch.

"Martyr Nyebera" by Kamikazee


"Ambisyoso" by Kamikazee


"Chiksilog" by Kamikazee


there is a reason why i chose this videos by Kamikazee. it not just because of the fact that they were sung by the same band/singers. i specifically chose them because of the songs and its videos. as you can see in the presented videos, they are enjoyable to watch because it has a funny story accompanying the songs. that is the reasons why i chose this videos.

"an analysis of selected videos of kamikazee uncovers how various visual techniques may be used to catch the viewing publics eye."

written above is my thesis statement.

the title of my analysis paper would be: "visual hooks in some music videos."

resources:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=Xne0LmwuWQ0
http://youtube.com/watch?v=6QTtC-hgtB0
http://youtube.com/watch?v=0opKAl_9Glc

me + emo = this blog

hm..*thinking...* another blog for all of you to read.. (who would ever want to read my work anyway? haha.. full of crap and things..)

me is emo.. happy, hyper emo..

i was thinking a while ago about three words.. "i love you" three very strong words.. who wouldnt want to hear this when it is coming from your lifetime crush? i surely would want that.. just like what happened this morning, my ex-girlfriend was asking me for another chance, saying that she will change and all that crap.. in a relationship you can only do 3 things: (1) love unconditionally, (2) give more than what you have, and (3)expect nothing in return..

now tell me, who has given up almost everything to his/her love one. talking about a partner in life and not your relatives. i sure have.. whoever knows my past wouldnt contradict to what i am saying.. i have sacrificed for the one i love for so long that i forgot how many times i cried in bed, my pillow all wet, my nose was runny, my eyes where as big as baseballs, as a result of crying..

why the hell am i reminiscing in the past.. past is past.. as i say.. it will never be forgotten but you can surely try!..


let me now concentrate on my future.. hm.. let me see... i am a 17 year old person(yes, i know, i am old!). ive done something bad yesterday (november 5, 2007), i was being emo in front of my friends. now my friends know how i am when i am not myself. a lot of them know me, all of them would say that i am a very jolly person. a very understanding person.. no wonder why many fall hard.. hu hu hu... changing the topic.. i like my bestest best friend right now..

her name... hm... *&%!@..secret!. hehe..

oohh.. pretty clouds... hehe.. favorite answer.. favorite question.. "inlove kba alexis??"

WTF=what the f*ck

ehehe.. weee.. me is hyper.. me is also sad.. buhu for me..

"love you angela.." oops... crap i said it.. hehe

me die...
me hate myself...
me not wanted...
me hated by everyone...
me is emo...
me is lonely...
me is hurt...
me is happy???
me is very much annoying...
me not missed my anyone...
me is ME!..
huhu
sorry poh sa mga masasaktan ah.. told you.. me is EMO!.. hehe.. sorry ulit.. do not take this seriously.. thanx...

me is EMO no more..
hope nobody reads and takes it seriously..
hehe
hm..
bbye emo mode..

NSTP camping...

normally this blog entry is about the recent happenings in our NSTP class. i never thought that camping can be a lot of fun. ha ha ha. i guess, i never experienced the things that happened in our camping. by the way, a lot of things happened. a lot that none of you may know. he he he.

a lot of things changed. i think one of the changes would be the 'opening' of my third eye, so to say. you want to know what happened? well, sorry for you, but until the moon turns to cheese, I'm not gonna tell. just that the opening of my third eye was a blast. who would've thought that a lot of things where happening under our noses and we don't even know what they are.

as i told in my earlier paragraphs, a lot happened during camp. i was told by a friend of mine that what i am doing was wrong, so i started to change the way i think about things in life. do unto others what you want others to do unto you. this statement used to be nothing to me. i always think that, i do things for others because i want to, and not because i wanted them to do it to me too. i just found out that my friends treat me the way i treat them, and, sad to say, i have been very neglectful about that. SORRY! i am sorry for my Friends who never fail to help me with my problems. Bosconians, i love you all. and for my friends in La Salle now, thank you very much.. and, i love you as much as i love my bosconian friends. (cheesy, but it is true). Nicol, Zyrille, Myco, thanks for everything you have done for me.

i learned a lot of things too in this camp. little about saint La Salle but a lot about my perspective in life. friends can become best friends in a matter of minutes, friends can become enemies, people can act like a fool in front of other people, people try and pretend that they are your friend but in reality, they are not.


bitin, my Saturday night was completely ruined by a person who i think has never been loved before. poor man, but what are we to do but follow the people in charge of our 'well-being'. funny how other people think you are doing something when you are not doing anything at all. accusation is never a good thing. i try to laugh about a lot of things in life, and i think that i would just want to laugh about this, too. even though i really am taking it seriously.

amazing, isn't it, that even how much tired you are, you still find time with your friends to laugh about something in the past. like what we did last Saturday night, before it was cut short.

all in all, the camping of NSTP was great. especially the river trekking. that was fun. plus the 'ghost-hunting', even though it was never part of the real camp agenda. ha ha. that is the reason why i feel so tired and sleepy. but, even though it was tiring, staying up and all that, i wont regret the things i did in camp.

this is already a long blog entry so maybe I'll stop, or maybe not. he he he. stopping..


*resisting the urge to type more things*:)

comments please...

taking it off...(masks)

'nothing is the matter with me.' he said giving out a faint sigh.'

'are you sure that nothing is bothering you?'

'yes! honestly, i am not sad. i am happy!'

this is an example of two friends talking over lunch or drinking soft drinks in the cafeteria. what else would you ask for when your friend says 'honestly...'. nobody in the world would know if he/she is saying the truth or the person is just lying to you to mislead you.except maybe if that friend of yours already knows you well enough to know that he/she is just pretending.

if everybody just told the truth about their real status in life, if they are truly happy or just pretending to be, their would be no web of lies. am i right if i say that almost everyone has lied at least ten times in their whole existence in this world. be it a white lie or not. in case you don't know, a white lie is a lie that you say to a friend when you don't want to hurt his/her feelings. it may seem like it isn't a lie but still, it is a lie.

if nobody told lies, nobody would have misunderstandings. don't get me wrong, i have told my share of lies. more than a lot of you. but, enough about me, i want you to know that no matter how much you lie, the truth will still come out. however deep you have kept it. if you don't believe me, think of the past things you have done, what you have told your friends. the stuff you boast about, are they all true? nonetheless no one can say that you are lying or not. we discussed that in our intro com subject. unless you perform 'leakages'. at least now i know that i am truly learning something.

now, about the masks earlier in this blog entry, i mentioned it because masks is very common nowadays to young people. you wear different kinds of masks. when you are with friends, you wear a mask, when your with relatives you also wear a mask. nowadays, masks are becoming our faces. sad to say, but nobody is being true to himself or herself.

now, masks are very helpful when pretending. let me use my earlier example for closing my blog entry.

'something is the matter with me. but i cant quite point my finger to it.' accompanied by a big sigh.

'you should talk to a friend, if you don't want to talk to me. at least you trust me as a friend to tell me the truth.'

'anyway, thanks.'

*after some weeks*

'hi there. thanks for your advice the other week. i appreciated it a lot'

'oh, your welcome, my pleasure to help you. did you get to solve your problem?'

'actually, i did talk to a friend, and she told me to just be true to my feelings.'

'ow, it was a love problem, i see.'

'and now, being true to myself, and not wanting to mislead you to the wrong thing, here i am saying i love you to you.'

...

Family Problems

wow. it's been a while since i got to write on my blog spot acct. ha ha ha. anyway, it is time for me to try and write something here. it is about my assignment in English one. well, here goes nothing and everything at the same time.

a lot can happen to a family. they could have other family problems; therefore, causing their own problems. having this problems can cause a lot of things that you don't or wouldn't like. for example, having a misunderstanding between family members can lead to the divorce of the parents. on the other hand, if their relationship lasts longer than that of the others, they might just be the perfect match for each other.

having problems with your parent's parents can lead to an angry family; nevertheless, if you avoid in helping your grand parents as a family, it would still cause some problems. however you try and help, it cannot be helped to have an argument amongst your parents and their parents.

another problem that you might encounter is that of your dad or mom may be having an affair with another guy or woman. the only effect i can see is that for your mom and your dad to call off their marriage, unless, of course they find a way to stop cheating on their spouse or husband.

love or friendship?

'love is a friendship on fire' some people often say this because no matter what happens, love always starts with friendship. almost every relationship starts with friendship. but, what is really better, love or friendship? let us look at some facts that will help us decide on what would be better.

when you have friends, you can tell them about your problems. but, when you are lovers, i think you would just have another one to problem yourself about. but when you stay as friends, you might just regret the chance that you might be the best of lovers but you didn't take the risk. on the other hand if you become lovers, you might never be the same again. his/her attitude may change for the worst when you become lovers. this is based on experience.

another fact about this is that if you become lovers, you may lose a friend. but the good thing about this is that, you may lose a friend, but gain a lifetime relationship. when you are friends, you can joke around every time. but when you become lovers, you may not have those kinds of times again with him/her.


i guess, either way you want it, be it, you want to stay friends or become lovers, you would still know the meaning of sacrifice and hardships. no matter what happens you will still feel joy with the company of that person and the sorrow with that person. so, i will just leave it to the readers to know whether what is much more better. be lovers or stay as friends.

catch me if you can

this is a story about frank William abignale. he is a very famous criminal. he fraud checks all over the united states. he travelled the world for free and he cashed in over 4 million dollars of fraud checks. if you would watch the film, you will know that frank was not always the convict. he was once a good boy in school, one time even, he impersonated his teacher. imagine, he was only eighteen when he did this but he was very good in impersonating.he then started faking checks and starting cashing in the check frauds.

the main story was that he became what he was because of his parents. he started noticing his mother seeing the boss of his father, behind his fathers back. he ran away from his parents who were getting divorced. after that, he got a so called job, by job, meaning impersonate someone. he always write to his father. he tells him the things he is doing and the things he wants to do.

after some months being a nineteen year old person, he was caught by a detective. the detective is named Carl hanratty. he was a detective of the united states of America. they caught frank abignale in France. he was caught by hanratty and the french police.

after he was caught he was hired by the agency which caught him and worked for them until he died. this is the story which i liked from the moment i have seen the movie.



i should guess that the theme analysis for this movie is that it is all about frank William abignale. by the way, this movie is based on a true story.i couldn't find the moral of the story so, i guess what i would want to say is that crime doesn't pay. it really doesn't. because, i know that frank abignale was good at impersonating people. but in the end he was caught, which means, whatever lie you say, whatever lie you do however small or big that is, you will eventually get caught.

classification

studying is a hassle when you have terror teachers. this is one type of teacher, they are the teachers who, when your caught being a happy go lucky person, will reprimand you right then and there. they can give you tons of assignments and you cant do anything but do it or else they will fail you. then, there are those jolly teachers who you can joke around with. they are the teachers who will make you think that assignments are of no importance but if you don't pass, they will definitely fail you in there subject. then are the 'okay' teachers. these teachers are the ones who don't care if you don't do your assignments as long as you wont fail their exams. still some teachers who i call 'moody' teachers tend to act like they are one with your group and try to be, like a member of your peers. these teachers can be very fun to be with at times, but there are times also when they can be very serious and easily to get annoyed. even thought teachers are different in their own way, they still do a good job in giving their lessons to students and never fail to give out assignments to their students.

relationship..reason..

i love.. they love.. we love.. everybody loves..

he he he.. nothing, just popped into my head that what if nobody told anybody how they felt about them? this would be a very very sad place. that is why, i think, love shouldn't be kept from the person that you love.

who would agree to me that everybody, even the priests, at some point in time, loved somebody? i believe that no one is capable of not loving. nobody here can tell me that they have never loved before, even the people who say that they never had a boyfriend or a girlfriend. maybe, those people who are saying that is very secretive. i admit loving is full of heartaches and hardships but the thought of someone liking you for what you are is what love is all about, isn't it?

hardships, heartaches and problems occur when you love, nobody can have the perfect relationship. arguing with your boyfriend/girlfriend would be the way for your relationship to get stronger and even better. nobody can have a relationship without hardships and troubles.

i say to you now, whatever happens in life, happens for a reason. for example, there is a reason why you are reading this blog entry of mine, which sucks by the way, and a reason why later, after reading this, you would give a comment for this blog. the same goes with love, love has different ways of revealing itself. for example, there is a person that you met through text, you think it is just fun and games when suddenly he/she texts you saying 'i love you'. you think for about a day or two and you realize, just for fun, to pretend to love that person back. and after several days, weeks, months, you forget why you even agreed to being his/her lover. then, you tend to break up with the person and you end up hurting that person more and more with each passing day. this happens to you, having the thought of his/her condition, because you are the person to teach him/her how to let go. it is hard, yes, but God works in mysterious ways. nobody knows what He has planned for us.

a lot of people would say that they are the master of their lives and that no one can tell them otherwise. i tell those people now, when you begin to love someone, you tend to forget that you are master of your life. you will be like being hypnotized and sooner or later will fall so hard for the wrong person and, may i add, get hurt in the process.

again, this are just random thoughts inside my head. letting them out little by little. ha ha ha... fun for me...

never again

never again.. strong words.. even stronger if kept. i never thought that i would say this but i guess i am fed up with all the shit that is happening in my life. he he. never again will i be looking for someone to be mine. if they want, they will come. that is what i am sure of. you may call me what you want. call me boastful, but i believe that whoever is meant for you will come to you, no matter what happens.

the other day, when i was sitting alone on my bed, i realized that a lot can happen during my time here on earth. so, to make my dreams-to find my soul mate or whatever-a reality i asked for a sign from God. that sign was for someone to tell me the words i wanted to hear. nobody knows what that is so, whoever says that to me, will be the right one for me.

i will no longer be in a hurry in search for the right person for me. i would take my friend's advice. to not be in a hurry falling in love, it will come. that was what she said. it made me think, what if nobody ever said that? what if, the right person for me, is with another guy? what if..

what can really happen in the next years to come? i could die tomorrow or the day after that. i could be taken by aliens. (exaggerated :p). but it is true, nobody knows what can happen in the future. life is about making decisions and if you knew what your life is going to be, that isn't what you call a life. that is called being controlled. being controlled by your own self interest. he he. okay okay, i know i am not making any sense here but i hope you get my idea. he he.

blogging blogging blogging.. i got out of my topic.. didn't i? anyway, i just love writing about anything i can think of. he he.

P.S. nget, thanks.. :p

read it if you can

you have stolen my heart..

nobody knows this until you tell them. if you want them to know it, you should tell. if you don't, and it was still known by the person, it only means she wants it too. a heart, metaphorically speaking, is an organ inside the body which without, you cannot function. i think that is why you say 'i love you with all my heart' to the one you are in live with. i think that is why many people commit suicide, excluding the people who have bad problems but including the people who are heart broken because of having lost their love one.

'heart broken' now there is another thought to ponder on. how can you say you are heart broken? if this is true, you are dead, or you are in the brink of dying. it can never be true if you encounter a break up or if your love one leaves you for another. funny thought that a heart is broken.

technically it is not your heart which is broken, but your spirit. it is like what the people who commit suicide experience. 'losing the will to live' that is the feeling of the people who commit suicide. i admit, i have experienced it time and time again but never did i think of committing suicide. i haven't even thought of doing that. i just say to myself that 'what about my mom?'.

after this blog, i hope i don't get the idea i had the last time my girlfriend said something bad to me. i hope i never get that thought of ever again.

ha ha. just letting off some anger. if you read this, thanks. if you don't, good for you. hope no one ever knows what it feels like loving someone who is in a rush to throw you away. ha ha. got that from a song. but it is true. hope nobody experiences that.

ending blog.............13

thanks for the memories

thanks for the memories by fall out boy.

i find this song very very amusing. not just because of the music video, also because of the message it relays to everyone. it is saying that no matter how bad your experience with one person is, you should learn to appreciate what that person has done for you. even though that person hurt you emotionally or physically, you should still thank him/her.

listen to the song's message closely and you would know what i mean. he he.

this is nothing. i just like the song. it relates to what happened to me recently.

listening

am i a good listener?
this is the question that pops into my mind every time i hear the word listen. i understand listening by understanding what you hear from the speaker. i am more likely correct because of the reason that we discussed it in English one class last Tuesday.

ms. Siriban explained that when you listen you should do at least 5 things. these things are: receiving, understanding, remembering, evaluating, and responding. with this being the basis of being a good listener, i think i can say that i am a good listener. i can say this now, because, i always listen to problems, be it my friends or politic problems. i try and find solutions inside my head. and now that i know that some girls doesn't always want answers for their problems, i would just keep it to myself. i learned that from my professor in English one.

thanks ma'am.. :)

anyway, i know now that i am a good listener to problems. but i think that i can still improve my being a good listener by trying to look at the topic in the speakers point of view. i think that by doing that, i can also be more of a good speaker. i can still improve my listening skills and that i am but another person who wants to improve his listening and speaking skills. so, i would do anything to improve them.

-end blog-

anime frenzy

anime anime anime. so cool, they are. happy, they make me. all, i like. none, i hate.

ha ha. that was just to see if i can still do the Yoda grammar. ha ha. happy. anyway it is all about anime, this blog is(Yoda possessing me again!). anime's are just cartoons, that is what adults think, except for the special few who create the anime and the people who haven't lost their inner child in them. ha ha. funny, but the anime is really awesome to watch. you can still learn a lot of things by watching them.

animes have philosophical meaning in them. i guess you should watch it again and try and get the meaning. for example, FMA(Full Metal Alchemist) has a philosophy in it and it is alchemy. if alchemy existed now, we would have no problem with a lot of things. for example, using alchemy could solve the hunger problem around the world. that is one, war can be stopped and because of it, no more people would die for the sake of the greed of anybody.

i challenge you to find the philosophical meaning in every anime you watch. ha ha.

i just wanted to share this. ha ha. because it just suddenly came to my attention that it is cartoons, but they are cartoons that you can learn a lot from. although it shows a lot of violence, you will still learn a lot from them.

-end blog-

comparison of high school to college

it seems just like yesterday that we were all in one classroom sitting and waiting for the teacher to come in. ha ha. but i guess that those days are now over. it is time for us to move from one classroom to the other to attend class. anyway, that being said, i would like to reiterate that college is very very much different than high school.

i can say this now because we were 'spoon-fed' during our high school days and that they said that they were preparing us for college life, they failed. that is for me, i guess all my other classmates are doing fine in college and that i am the only one to be failing algebra and PE. this is really embarrassing for me to say but PE is easy, that is what i thought, until i met the topic in PE that made me fail. ha ha. a lot of things can happen in college. it wouldn't be nice if the professor is absent. unlike in high school. in high school when the teacher is absent, they would be a substitute teacher. in college you wouldn't have one. the prof will just get your attendance and it is your time already.

high school was fun, i admit, but for me, college is much better. in college you cant go around making a fool of yourself and being the 'boss' or 'siga'. although it is fun, you have a lot more responsibilities than in high school. you might meet enemies along your way and a lot of friends.

a word of advice to the incoming freshmen college, be friendly. don't be a snob and think you can make it through college without friends, you cannot. you are lucky if you find friends who stand by your side in good times and bad times. like my friends. ha ha. i love my friends in la salle. they are cool!

anyway, that's that. ha ha. i hope a lot of people who read this can follow the advice. well, i don't know if it will work for you, but it did for me. so i say it. ha ha.

--end blog--

a place

loud noises can be heard just outside of the room. you can hear the voices shouting in astonishment and joy. you can hear there voices shouting like kids, shouting as if there was someone asking another someone in public to marry him. in short, the shouting was full of 'yihee's'. i know that some of them were just shouting like that because of the performance they just witnessed. in utter amazement they were all shouting.

i went to the room to see what was happening. upon reaching the door closest to me , i could see benches, and on top of the benches, i could see bags, bulky bags. some of the benches have wet t-shirts on top and still other benches have rubber shoes. i could see people sitting on the benches that are unoccupied by bags, t-shirts, and shoes. i could make out some of the voices. i knew that one of the voices belonged to Carlito Gonzales.

upon entering the room i was called by some of my friends which were sitting just beside the window. come to think of it, there were a lot of windows inside this room, this rooms ceiling is 2 times higher than the normal classroom. i examined it more closely and then noticed that there was no air con or even electric fans. this is weird because, normally, rooms have air cons, and, even if they didn't have air cons, at least an electric fan. by the way, this room was so big, at least three classrooms put together.

i could hear all my friends shouting because of the ongoing rally being showed. in this room you will see a lot of lines, although they are separated, you can still make out the figure they are making. it forms a rectangular shape, with a lot of the lines were over lapping each other.

people were shouting much louder because the opponent missed the shot and his opponent got the score. although they were shouting, i could hear the person who got the point shout 'yes!'. both of the players were holding a racket clasped on there right hand. apparently, the game was over and they both went to the middle of the court and, above the five foot net, they shook each others hands as a sign of respect, and to say that there were no sore losers during the game.

i guess, you know now what room i am talking about, don't you?

..why am i in school..

i am in school because i like to learn new things and meet new friends while i'm at it. in school i am also being prepared to become a responsible human being. i go to school for my parents who love me so much and i go because they want me to have a good future. but, i tell you now, even if they do not ask me to go to school i will surely insist them to enrol me for school. i dont know why but i like learning new things.

i am studying, like what i said earlier, to be prepared of what is ahead of me in the near future. i also have the task to handle our family business when everyone else is too old and cranky to continue handling it. i take studying as a burden for me, but i shouldnt be taking it for granted, should i? i know a lot of kids in the world doesnt have the privelage to go to school like i do and now that i realize it, i wouldnt like to have some hindrance from me and my school. this is because, i like my school very muh. here, i can talk to my friends and ask for there help in some things i do not know about.

i also like DLSU-canlubang because it is surrounded by trees and green stuff which is calming and a very nice studying place.

this is why i go to school. although not all my answers are direct to the point, i guess you could understand.

Comparative Analysis

shaman king opening theme song (northern lights):






hunterXhunter opening theme song (Ohayo):






Full Metal Alchemist opening theme song (ready, steady, go)






what they all have in common is, although it is obvious, that they are all coming from anime shows, for example, northern lights comes from the anime show 'shaman king', ohayo is the song of the show HunterXHunter, and ready, steady, go comes from Full Metal Alchemist.

shaman king song (northern lights) - although it is in Japanese, you can understand its meaning by the video. in the video, it shows how much yoh asakura(main character) had to do so that he would be able to defeat his rival hau asakura(his evil twin brother). it can also be seen in the video that yoh asakura, along with his friends ends up defeating his evil twin.

HunterXHunter (Ohayo) - it is shown in this video that the anime is all about the friendship they have with each other and that nothing can keep them apart. they became so bonded together that whatever their friend is in trouble, they would go to him and help him. no matter what. they end up going to greed island and they are looking for something that one of their friends need to find his father.

Full Metal Alchemist (ready, steady, go) - this talks about Edward elric(the main character) and his brother Alfons elric. there journey is to find the philosophers stone that is needed, so they say, to bring back the dead. they end up encountering a lot of military people who lets them become a soldier. it is very very interesting to watch and you would really get into it.



speaking about the music videos, my favorite is ready, steady, go. this is because it almost tells the things that the elric brothers will go through. unlike hunterXhunetr's theme song that only shows the four of the friends closely bonding together. and just like the FMA's theme song, i like the shaman king's theme song. i like it because it shows their trials for them to achieve their goals and for them to defeat their enemies.

i exceptionally like the theme song of full metal alchemist, second would be shaman king, and lastly would be hunterXhunter.

welcome to my mind =(

i define dying as a loss of someone who you love dearly. in short dying for me is having to break up with the perfect woman or having to watch your father die in the middle of the night. that is dying for me.

i feel like i am dying all over again. i know i haven't got much time left before she kills me again but i don't think i would want to die again after i died three times for her.

i know my friends keep on telling me that i do not deserve her and that i should forget about her and whatever relationship we had. but i say to all of you, you do not know how much i love her. i am very sorry for having done what i did and that i am always here for my friends. but the question i am asking myself now is, till when will i be here for my friends? till i die, maybe. i wish i was never me. i wish that i was somebody else for a change. i don't know why i am like this. however i try to change, i simply cannot change for anybody.

i know people take me for granted, and i don't like it one bit. but whatever happens i will always be here for them. i just don't know why is it that i am being taken for granted when i value my friends so much. i would gladly take my own life for a true friend.

a true friend.. does it really exist? do i even have one? if a true friend is described as someone who takes you for granted, then i have a lot of true friends. why should i love my friends who take me for granted? i don't deserve them. i believe i am doing the best i can to be a good friend to everyone.

i have a lot of friends, 2 of them became my girlfriend and one of them ended up killing me. though she may say that i am the one who keeps hurting myself, i don't believe her. because if i do hurt myself, i would gladly kill myself.

"all good things come to an end"

how true.. for me, and for almost everybody i know believes in this statement. i tell you all now, i have a lot of problems, none of them i could think of consciously, but i know that at the back of my mind i am trying hard to fight the urge to commit suicide.

i may be weird for other people, i maybe smart to some, i may even be cool to the few, but i see myself as a boy who nobody cares about. that is how i see myself. i don't even think that my real problem is the girl, i think my problem is myself. i don't know why i am like this but a lot of people like my personality.(i think)

but who cares about the 'other people' shouldn't everyone just care about themselves. i don't think that people should become popular just to win other people's attention, but i think that everyone should be of equal importance to anyone. i don't treat people for what there status in life is, i treat them the way i should be treating them. i was never fond of people arguing about me, of what i should have and shouldn't have. i am happy with what i have.

i thik i act like this today because of what happened to me when i was i kid...

i was never the popular kid in school. i was the kid who didnt care what the other kids thought about him. i knew back then that it would have some effect when i grow up. and guess what, i was right. i was the one always being teased at school, you would think that i am this bully when i was a kid, but you would be wrong. i was a pushover when i was in schol and i was never the popular one. i never took vengance to the people who teased me and made my childhood a living hell because i know that it would be wrong.

being an only child you would think that i got all the attention i needed. you would do good to think again. i rarely asked my parents for anything. i dont think they know but there were times when i was really envious of my nephew because he always got everything he wanted. in short, he was spoiled by his parents. i dont know why but i guess my mind was a bit advanced when i was 5 yrs. old. i can say this because i knew that my parents cant afford the things i wanted and that i, saving my breath and salive, didnt bother to ask them. because deep inside i knew what there answer is going to be. it would be: 'nak, wala pa tayong pera eh. next time nalang kapag nakaipon na tayo.'

back then i already understood what they were saying unlike the other children around our neighborhood. i was always the sort of child who would think twice before i would do something. i would think about the consequences if i did that thing.



*this are just random thoughts. you can just not mind it.*

what a kiss means..

WHAT EAH KISS MEANS

-Kiss on the Upperchest: I'm ready.
-Kiss on the Forehead: We're cutetogether .
-Kiss on the Cheek: We're friends.
-Kiss on the Hand: I adore you.-Kiss on the Neck: I want you, now.
-Kiss on the Shoulder: Your perfect.
-Kiss on the Lips: I think i like you.
____________________________________________________
WHAT A GESTURE MEANS

-Holding Hands: We definitely likeeach other.
-Slap on the Butt: Your fun.
-Holding you tight pressed againsteach other: I want you.
-Looking into each other's Eyes: Ilike you, for who you are.
-Playing with Hair: Let's fool around.
-Arms around the Waist: I like youtoo much to let go.
-Laughing while Kissing: I amcompletely comfortable with you.
____________________________________________________

Advice:Don't ask for a kiss, take one.If you were thinking about someonewhile reading this,you're definitely in Love.

perfect relationship :(

you would think that when you are happy in a relationship you wont be hurt anymore. but as one of my classmates said in our intercom class, "all good things come to an end".

this specifies that when you are happy, it cannot last long, even if you try so hard. i made a mistake of giving my everything to this girl who ended up hurting me deep down inside! although not physically. i wish she didn't do that because i am so deeply in love with her, until now, even though we broke up months ago.

there is no such thing as a perfect relationship. the only thing you can do is to do your best to keep holding on to that relationship. whatever happens, happens for a reason, if you are unable to make your relationship work, maybe that means that you are not made for each other.

i thought i could easily move on. then i realized that i miss her so much when i am in crowds and sitting alone in my room.

i don't know why but she just keeps on popping into my mind for no reason at all. just this morning when i woke up, i was about to take a bath when her face popped up in my mind. i thought that i was not thinking of her anymore. well, i guess i thought wrong. i hope that we didn't break up. to think that just last march to April me and that girl were so happy with each others company. but now, we are just, acquaintances. i should act, as i told her, as if we never even met each other in person. i told her that we should act like JUST textmates. i didn't think that i would be the one who would have a hard time forgetting her as my girlfriend.

i am now, lonely but i have a girlfriend who i love,but am afraid that what i am feeling is just infatuation. :(

i am really sorry if that were to happen, i wouldn't want to hurt people just because i am me..

i am sad because i thought we had a lifetime relationship. i guess i was wrong. hm.. but i am happy i had that relationship with her. i learned a lot! hm..

i thank her for that and i hate her for what she did to me. huhu.

*sob sob sob*

philosophy

...philosophy...

philosophy is a revolutionary and vitally important for a good life.

philosophy comes from two Greek words namely, 'philos' meaning love and 'sophia' meaning wisdom. in short it means love of wisdom. but it is wisdom that results from the pursuit of knowledge of the most important parts of reality.

philosophy has 10 commandments,, which are the following:

1. allow the spirit of wonder to flourish in your breast.
2. doubt every claim you encounter until the evidence convinces you of its truth.
3. love the truth
4. divide and conquer
5. collect and construct
6. conjecture and refute
7. revise and rebuild
8. seek simplicity
9. live the truth
10. live the good

Plato is one of the important philosophers who ever lived. he was the first one to write systematically on the philosophical subjects

Socrates is one of the most impressive human beings to have lived, and a paradigm of a philosopher.

reference:

Pojman, P. (1992). Philosophy the quest for truth second edition. Belmont, California. Wadsworth Publishing Company

i dont get people!

why do people do things that would ruin their lives and their neighbor's lives?

i really don't get people.

people say that promises are made to be kept, but it doesn't always seem true.
people say that rules are made to be followed, but the rules that are made is being bent and being broken by the people who make the rules.
people always say that nobody is supposed to hurt another person when in a fight and that, sticks and stones can break some bones but words can never harm you physically. but why is it that almost every fight we get into starts with insults and taunts.

i really don't get people.

people start wars when they can start peace.
people don't get the thought of the previous leaders that only want peace and harmony but the leaders now only think that the past leaders wanted to have power!
people don't get everything they see and hear but they act like they already know this stuff.
people don't take the time to think twice what they are doing and what consequences it will have against them and the people around them.

i really don't get people.

people commit suicide because they have a lot of problems. don't they think that they are not the only ones with problems?
people have lots of problems but they don't commit suicide like the others.

i really don't get people.

who can help me understand this people who are doing this stuff?
do i need professional help?

i don't think so, i think the persons who need help are the people who abuse power, who try to commit suicide and the people who start wars instead of starting peace!

high school life

another school year has ended and now we, the seniors, are moving up to another part of our life. high school life is the best.remember the days we passed our projects,helped our teachers, recited in front of the entire student body.how we gave our teachers a hard time during our classes. having liked someone but not having the guts to say it. wanting to dance to the person we love but not having the courage to do so.keeping secrets from our friends, classmates and teachers. sneaking past our teachers. texting in class even when the tr. is discussing. he he.. good times.

High school is good times. Happy moments and sad moments are the nice things about high school.life starts at the end of high school!..
this is my blog entry for all graduates, upcoming graduates and soon to be in high school. a word of advice, don't waste the opportunities that come your way during high school, because it will never come again in your life!.

i love my high school days! and i am dearly missing it too.

..death..

death.. death is inevitable.. you will eventually come to this point in your life. for my father, it came last tuesday 17 july 2007. he died at 10:15 pm. It is hard to miss someone who has been with you almost every time you needed him. my father is a good man, i am sad because of his death but a part of me is happy, because he is no longer in pain. i still remember how he would criticize the wrestlers of WWE. how he would always beat me at chess. how he would suddenly make jokes about anything he sees.

I'm gonna miss my father dearly. in fact, i am missing him right now. how i wish i had the time to tell him what i wanted to say to him. the secrets i wanted to tell him. everything that is happening to me in school and with my friends! but now, the time has come, and he must face his final curtain. the curtain on his marvelous life has just been closed and now, all of us is missing him.

just last night i told him that i love him and until now i feel that i didn't show him my love. i think that he feels that i love him. but i don't think i was right in what i felt. anyway, now that he is gone. i pray for him to be in a beautiful place and that nothing is hurting him. i hope and pray that we be reunited and be one whole family once again. many of my relatives new him as a jolly person, well, he is. in fact, before he died, he smiled and took his last breathe. he doesn't forget how to smile. he never did and never will he...

this blog entry is from my innermost thoughts about my fathers death...

Antonio B. Mendiola
born on:april 29,1965
died on:july 17, 2007

happy times

i am happy today because i helped a lot of people today! he he. i like helping people and i don't know why. i guess it is in my nature to help the people around me and to give advices. he he. i guess that is the reason why i am so happy almost every time.

i am exceptionally happy today because i have told my best friend what i really feel about her. i was not planning to tell her but because of the change in my attitude and my change of heart for her, i was forced to think otherwise.

i am also happy because of all my subjects and my professors. i think i was happy because all of my professors are good and teach very well.

to say honestly, i am seldom sad when i am with friends. because of my best friend i cannot be sad all the time, even if i am really sad. she makes me happy even if i am so sad. ha ha. i like her for that, i also like my friends because they, just like my best friend, make me happy.

with that being said, i end my blog.

ha ha. i just want to share everything on my mind.